Thankfully, I am one of more than three million Australians who have already cast their ballots in the Federal Election.
The idea of standing in a lengthy queue on Saturday; completing my civic duty and exercising my public right irks me. As does the stunned look on an Electoral Commission employees’ face when I inform them that I certainly do know the name of the electorate in which I am enrolled to vote.
Apparently, there are many who don’t. Hard to believe really and potentially an indictment on the entire system; with the votes of the less informed often ‘bought’ at the 11th hour with a repetitive and often baseless catchphrase, claim or lie.
Having voted early also allows me to avoid volunteers thrusting colourful pamphlets in my face as well as the sight of the candidates cheesy smiles on the advertising boards outside my local primary school.
Sausage on a roll sales will be well and truly down this Saturday.
It stands to be a monumental day. In the blue corner, a Prime Minister at the bridge of what appears to be a sinking ship; torpedoed by a series of professional, leadership and book keeping errors made over the last 12 months.
The ghosts of two dethroned Coalition leaders lurk in the background and the disgraceful press release from Tony Abbott after the passing of former Prime Minister Bob Hawke might just have provided the final nail in the conservatives’ coffin.
In the red corner, the union man who cannot take two steps without the words ‘new tax’ being launched in his direction. Running on a platform of higher wages and greater fairness and opportunity for all Australians, Bill Shorten has been lampooned as a useless financial manager.
Upon what precedent that assessment is made is unclear, however that is indeed the Liberals’ claim.
Warbling away rather comically in the background is one Ms Pauline Hanson. Likely to poll a low single figure percentage of the primary vote, One Nation looks set for a disappointing result after some of its male members sunk the campaign with their misogynistic and gun toting antics.
The so-called United Australia Party has successfully managed to annoy the heck out of millions of Australians with a wickedly persistent social media bombardment.
With a personal wealth estimated at around AUD$1.8 billion in January 2019, Clive Palmer has struggled to convince Joe and Janet average that the ‘unity’ referred to in his party name is actually his altruistic goal.
Questions around the inappropriate reimbursement of a number of his past employees linger and his jolly, patriot persona appears transparent to most.
The Australian Greens continue to fight the good fight; morally aware of the need to expand our reliance on alternative energy sources and phase out 20th Century technologies that have had a proven and considerable negative effect on the health of our planet.
Toss into the mix Bob Katter and Australia’s favourite racist Fraser Anning and the political air is as thick with falsehoods, fallacy and farce as ever before.
Just when things looked like settling down in the final throes of the campaign, Kerri-Anne Kennerley decided to make a last ditch attempt to save Scott Morrison’s skin with an on-air tantrum that had all the earmarks of a petulant child being denied a lolly.
It is the very same lolly that has become the focal point of the entire campaign, with Labor’s plan to redistribute wealth more equitably, apparently threatening Kennerley’s personal fortune.
Her reference to older Australian’s ‘leeching’ off the senior’s pension was truly abhorrent and as with Abbott’s faux pas, helped the Coalition not one bit.
Perhaps the most pleasing statement made in the final days of the campaign was Alan Jones’ suggestion that a Labor win would see him take his kit bag of hypocrisy off into the wilderness.
With at least one betting agency having already paid out clients who invested on a Labor victory, it appears Jones may be forced to call his own bluff.
For those who will need to attend a polling place tomorrow, enjoy your sausage and think about all the candidates and what you want Australia’s personality to be.
Personally, I feel we have had enough of space invading, elitist and macho leadership. Moreover, an inclusive Australia with no place for rampant nationalism and bigotry would make a nice change.
Seeing Australians awarded appropriate penalty rates, wages and conditions, as well as removing baby boomer bonuses funded by tax payers, would also be positive steps.
Australia needs such steps in 2019. Sadly, the process to achieve those changes has been a grubby road of immaturity and fabrication.
People will vote after trawling through all the crap. Let’s hope they remember that the nation was a far better place when it was a society and not an economy.